Goal Setting

New Year’s Resolutions: 2004

Do you use the New Year to motivate you in the making life changes, or are you one of those people who groan at the thought of another New Year’s resolution? Typically, people change for two basic reasons—they are either sick and tired of being sick and tired, and “the disgust” motivates them to alter their behavior. Or, they use the New Year as a rebirth or renewal to begin new behaviors.

Either motivator requires that you psyche yourself into the change by thinking, preparing, and planning for that change.
• Think about it. Think about how your goal would feel if you decided that it was going to be a lifestyle change forever. Although I adhere to the “one day at a time” strategy, I also know that most of the goals that people need to implement need to occur for a lifetime. Therefore, it is important to think about them as lifestyle changes
• Prepare for it. What is it you want to accomplish? What strategies will you need e to make it happen? Prepare and plan for actions daily. This only takes about 5-15 minutes per day. Will you need to get up earlier each day and write down one goal statement to keep you focused? It may look like this: “I will decrease arguing with the kids by walking away after I have made one statement.” or “I will bring a delicious, low-calorie dessert to the party this weekend to resist the temptation to eat the cheesecake.” or “I will get on the computer each morning and send a response to an interesting profile on Match.com.”
• Create the Plan. Since creating change requires forethought, it will be helpful if you write a page or two about what you will need to do to implement your plan. Write out the steps and ask for support. Then think of a word that symbolizes the change, and write the word in five or six places where you can see if every day. Use it as a mechanism to reinforce your behavior. Stay enthusiastic and enjoy the results that occur!

What changes would you like to make in 2004? Would you like a different job? Or to go back to school? Would you like to go to bed one hour earlier or get up one hour before the kids? Would you like to take an acting class? Make friends with your computer? Would your life be enhanced if you went back to church? Think of the goal and how it will impact you in three months, six months, or in the year 2005. Take a few moments to visualize how your life would be different.

You have two choices in your goal-setting. You can focus on what you are giving up, which would likely keep you stuck in that interpersonal struggle of deprivation. For many people, thinking about deprivation starts them in a failure cycle. People frequently plan for one last hedonistic encounter with the negative behavior. You know the type—people going on a diet will indulge in one last eating and drinking binge. People who resolve to exercise will avoid doing any strenuous activity and may even have a more symbiotic relationship with the couch because they know they will be exercising in the future. Work on not engaging in such sabotaging behaviors.

Your second choice is to stay positive and expect a lot of exciting new changes because you are investing in yourself.

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